Your mother is a stranger to me, and I’m not going to clean up after her! If you want to, go there yourself and wash her toilet!”
The morning was freezing. Irina stood at the stove, flipping pancakes, when Semyon walked into the kitchen. His gait showed irritation — he was clearly about to start an unpleasant conversation.
“Mom called,” he began, sitting down at the table. “She asked you to stop by today and clean up after yesterday.”
Irina froze with the spatula in her hand. Yesterday, her mother-in-law, Valentina Petrovna, had hosted her sisters — Nadezhda and Tamara. They had celebrated the eldest sister’s birthday. Irina, of course, had not been invited.
“After what yesterday?” she slowly turned to her husband. “After the party I wasn’t even invited to?”
“Ira, don’t start. You know Mom likes spending time with her sisters. It’s more comfortable for them without the younger crowd.”
“The younger crowd? Semyon, I’m thirty-five years old! And why is this ‘younger crowd’ supposed to clean up after their gatherings?”
Semyon waved his hand in irritation.
“Because you’re the daughter-in-law. It’s your duty to help Mom.”
“DUTY?” Irina threw the spatula onto the table. “Since when? Your mother has two actual sisters who live in the building next door. She has a son — YOU! Why exactly am I supposed to scrub her apartment every week?”
“Don’t dramatize it. Just help an elderly person.”
“Elderly? Your mother is sixty-two, and she runs faster than I do! Last week I saw her carrying three bags of groceries from the store. But when I come over, she immediately turns into a helpless old woman who can’t even pick up a rag!”
Semyon got up from the table, his face reddening.
“Enough! You’re going today, and that’s final. I won’t allow my wife to treat my mother like this!”
“You won’t allow it?” Irina stepped right up to him. “In ten years of our marriage, have you gone there even once to clean for her yourself? Have you ever picked up a mop in her apartment?”
“That’s women’s work!”
“Oh, women’s work? Then let the women from YOUR family do it — your aunts! Or your cousin Marina, who lives one entrance away from your mother!”
Semyon grabbed his jacket and headed for the door.
“I’m late for work. By tonight, Mom’s place had better be clean. And don’t you dare embarrass me!”
The door slammed. Irina remained standing in the middle of the kitchen, clenching her fists. She had endured it for ten years. For ten years, every Saturday, she had gone to her mother-in-law’s place — washing, doing laundry, cooking. And the woman had taken it for granted. Worse, she had started bossing her around, giving orders, criticizing.
The phone rang. Her mother-in-law’s number.
“Irinka, when are you coming?” Valentina Petrovna’s voice sounded demanding. “It’s such a mess here after yesterday! My girls stayed until late.”
“Valentina Petrovna, I won’t be able to today.”
“What do you mean, you won’t be able to? Who’s going to clean? With my health, I’m not allowed to strain myself!”
“Call Nadezhda or Tamara. They celebrated yesterday — let them clean.”
“What do you think you’re doing! They work!”
“I work too, by the way. I have my own flower shop.”
“Oh please, she sells little flowers! That’s not work, that’s entertainment. Nadezhda is a chief accountant, and Tamara is a deputy director!”
Irina took a deep breath.
“Then let Semyon come. She’s his mother.”
“Semyon is busy! He has an important position! Not like you — sitting in your little shop all day with nothing else to do! So get ready and come over. And bring cleaning supplies, I’ve run out.”
“NO.”
“What do you mean, no?”
“It means I’m no longer going to be your free cleaning lady. Hire a cleaning service.”
“You ungrateful little thing! I accepted you into the family, and you!..”
Irina hung up. A minute later, the phone rang again — Semyon.
“Mom told me everything! Go to her immediately!”
“Semyon, I suggest making a schedule. Let everyone take turns helping your mother. You, me, your aunts, Marina…”
“What schedule? Are you out of your mind? It’s your duty!”
“Why MINE? Explain the logic to me!”
“Because you’re the wife! You’re supposed to take care of my mother!”
“And you’re the husband! Why don’t you take care of HER?”
“I earn money!”
“I earn money too! And by the way, last month my income was higher than yours!”
“To hell with your little flowers! You’re going to Mom’s today, or…”
“Or what?” Irina felt a wave of anger rising inside her. “What will you do, Semyon?”
That evening, Semyon came home furious. Valentina Petrovna had been calling him all day, complaining, crying, demanding that he “take action.”
“Did you go?” he asked from the doorway.
Irina was sitting in the living room with a book.
“No, I didn’t go. And I’m not going.”
“Then get ready right now. I’ll drive you.”
“Semyon, if your mother needs help, help her yourself. Here’s my offer: let’s go together. You wash the floors, I’ll do the dishes. Or the other way around.”
“Are you mocking me? I’m tired after work!”
“And what am I, made of iron? I had twenty orders today! I’ve been on my feet since six in the morning!”
Semyon walked right up to her.
“I’m telling you for the last time — you’re going to Mom’s. Right now.”
“NO.”
“Then get out of my apartment!”
“Our apartment, Semyon. I pay half the mortgage.”
“I don’t care! If you don’t want to fulfill your duties as a wife, then you’re not my wife!… Continued just below in the first comment.”
The morning turned out frosty. Irina was standing at the stove, flipping pancakes, when Semyon entered the kitchen. His walk showed his displeasure — he was clearly about to start an unpleasant conversation.
“Mom called,” he began, sitting down at the table. “She asked you to stop by today and clean up after yesterday.”
Irina froze with the spatula in her hand. Yesterday, her mother-in-law, Valentina Petrovna, had hosted her sisters — Nadezhda and Tamara. They had celebrated the elder sister’s birthday. Irina, naturally, had not been invited.
“After what yesterday?” she slowly turned to her husband. “After the party I wasn’t even invited to?”
“Ira, don’t start. You know Mom likes spending time with her sisters. It’s more comfortable for them without the younger generation.”
“The younger generation? Semyon, I’m thirty-five! And why, then, should this ‘younger generation’ clean up after their get-together?”
Semyon waved his hand irritably.
“Because you’re the daughter-in-law. It’s your duty to help Mom.”
“DUTY?” Irina threw the spatula onto the table. “Since when? Your mother has two biological sisters who live in the neighboring building. She has a son — YOU! Why exactly am I supposed to scrub her apartment every week?”
“Don’t dramatize. Just help an elderly person.”
“Elderly? Your mother is sixty-two, and she runs faster than I do! Last week I saw her carrying three bags of groceries from the store. But when I come over, she instantly turns into a helpless old lady who can’t even pick up a rag!”
Semyon got up from the table, his face turning red.
“Enough! You’re going today, and that’s final. I won’t allow my wife to treat my mother like that!”
“You WON’T ALLOW it?” Irina stepped right up to him. “In the ten years we’ve been married, have you gone to her place even once to clean? Have you ever picked up a mop in her apartment?”
“That’s women’s work!”
“Oh, women’s work? Then let the women from YOUR family do it — your aunts! Or your cousin Marina, who lives one entrance away from your mother!”
Semyon grabbed his jacket and headed for the door.
“I’m late for work. By evening, Mom’s place had better be clean. And don’t you dare embarrass me!”
The door slammed. Irina remained standing in the middle of the kitchen, clenching her fists. For ten years she had endured it. For ten years, every Saturday, she had gone to her mother-in-law’s place — to wash, do laundry, cook. And that woman had taken it for granted. More than that, she had begun ordering her around, pointing things out, criticizing.
The phone rang. Her mother-in-law’s number.
“Irinka, when are you coming?” Valentina Petrovna’s voice sounded demanding. “There’s such a mess here after yesterday! My girls stayed until late.”
“Valentina Petrovna, I won’t be able to come today.”
“What do you mean, you won’t be able to? Who’s going to clean? With my health, I can’t strain myself!”
“Call Nadezhda or Tamara. They were the ones celebrating yesterday — let them clean.”
“How dare you! They work!”
“I work too, by the way. I have my own flower shop.”
“Big deal, she sells little flowers! That’s not work, that’s entertainment. Nadezhda is a chief accountant, and Tamara is a deputy director!”
Irina took a deep breath.
“Then let Semyon come. She’s his mother.”
“Semyon is busy! He has an important position! Not like you — sitting in your little shop all day with nothing else to do! So get ready and come. And bring cleaning supplies; I’ve run out.”
“NO.”
“What do you mean, no?”
“It means I’m no longer going to be your free cleaning lady. If you want, hire a cleaning service.”
“You ungrateful thing! I accepted you into the family, and you—!”
Irina hung up. A minute later, the phone rang again — Semyon.
“Mom told me everything! Go to her immediately!”
“Semyon, I suggest making a schedule. Let everyone take turns helping your mother. You, me, your aunts, Marina…”
“What schedule? Have you lost your mind? It’s your duty!”
“Why MINE? Explain the logic to me!”
“Because you’re the wife! You’re supposed to take care of my mother!”
“And you’re the husband! Why don’t you take care of HER?”
“I earn money!”
“I earn money too! And by the way, last month my income was higher than yours!”
“To hell with your little flowers! You’re going to Mom today, or…”
“Or what?” Irina felt a wave of anger rising inside her. “What will you do, Semyon?”
That evening, Semyon returned home furious. Valentina Petrovna had been calling him all day, complaining, crying, demanding that he “take action.”
“Did you go?” he asked from the doorway.
Irina was sitting in the living room with a book.
“No, I didn’t go. And I won’t.”
“Then get ready right now. I’ll drive you.”
“Semyon, if your mother needs help, help her yourself. Here’s an offer: let’s go together. You’ll wash the floors, and I’ll do the dishes. Or the other way around.”
“Are you mocking me? I’m tired after work!”
“And I’m made of iron, then? I had twenty orders today! I’ve been on my feet since six in the morning!”
Semyon stepped right up to her.
“I’m telling you for the last time — you’re going to Mom. Right now.”
“NO.”
“Then get out of my apartment!”
“Our apartment, Semyon. I pay half the mortgage.”
“I don’t care! If you don’t want to fulfill your duties as a wife, then you’re not my wife!”
Irina stood up, setting the book aside.
“Excellent. Then let’s start with your duties as a husband. When was the last time you helped me around the house? When did you cook dinner? When did you go grocery shopping?”
“That’s not men’s work!”
“And breaking your back carrying bags for your mother — is that men’s work? Last week she made me move a wardrobe! A WARDROBE, Semyon! I had to treat my back for three days afterward!”
“Mom is a weak woman!”
“She could lift a barbell if she wanted to! You’ve all just gotten used to stupid Irka doing everything!”
Semyon grabbed her by the shoulders.
“Don’t you dare talk about my mother like that!”
“GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME!” Irina pulled free. “And here’s what I’ll tell you, dear husband. Your mother is a STRANGER to me! A completely strange woman who, in ten years, has never once thanked me — only criticized and humiliated me! And I’m not going to clean up after her anymore!”
“Oh, is that so? Then get out! And make sure you’re not here tomorrow!”
“Wonderful!” Irina headed for the bedroom. “Only you’re the one who’s moving out!”
The next day, Irina woke up to an insistent doorbell. On the doorstep stood Valentina Petrovna herself, and behind her — her sisters.
“So this is where you’re hiding, you snake!” her mother-in-law began from the threshold. “You drove my son to a nervous breakdown!”
“First of all, hello. Second, I’m not hiding anywhere — I’m in my own home. Third, what do all of you want?”
Tamara, the younger sister, smiled sarcastically.
“We came to explain your place to you, dear.”
“My place?” Irina crossed her arms. “And what place would that be?”
“You must obey your husband and help your mother-in-law!” Nadezhda snapped. “That is your duty!”
“My duty? And where is your duty to help your own sister?”
“We are busy people!” Tamara protested.
“And according to you, I’m suffering from idleness? I have a business, in case you forgot.”
“Little flowers are not a business!” Valentina Petrovna snorted. “It’s just a pastime!”
“A pastime that brings in three hundred thousand a month,” Irina replied calmly. “More than your precious Syoma’s salary.”
“Don’t you dare call my son that!”
“What should I call him, then? Mommy’s boy? A doormat?”
“How dare you!” Nadezhda shrieked.
“I DARE!” Irina raised her voice. “And here is what I will tell you, my dear relatives! From today on, I am doing NOTHING for you! No cleaning, no cooking, no shopping! Valentina Petrovna, you have a son — let him help you! You have two sisters — be my guest! You have a niece, Marina — how is she worse than me?”
“Marina is married, she has children!”
“And what, mine are supposed to appear from a test tube? I would have children too, if not for your dear son, who has been feeding me empty promises for ten years!”
“Semyon isn’t ready for children! He’s still young!”
“He’s thirty-eight years old, Valentina Petrovna! At that age, some people are already babysitting grandchildren!”
“Don’t lecture me! You will never set foot in my house again!”
“I wasn’t planning to! You can live in your own filth! Or let Semyon come over and clean your toilet!”
“Semyon would never stoop so low!”
“Exactly! NEVER! Because you raised an egoist and a mommy’s boy! He’s used to women dancing around him! First you, and now it’s supposed to be me!”
“You’ll regret this!” Tamara hissed. “Semyon will find himself a normal wife who knows her place!”
“By all means!” Irina flung the door open. “Let him look! And now — GET OUT OF MY HOME!”
A week passed. Semyon was living with his mother, occasionally sending messages with threats and demands that Irina “come to her senses.” Irina did not answer. She had filed for divorce and was busy with her shop.
On Saturday, the phone rang. An unfamiliar number.
“Hello?”
“Irina Vladimirovna?” a man’s voice asked. “This is Andrei Palych, Valentina Petrovna’s neighbor. We have an emergency here.”
“What happened?”
“Well, your husband and his mother had a fight. Such a scandal — the whole building heard it!”
“And?”
“And Valentina Petrovna demanded that he clean the apartment. And he, excuse me, told her to go to hell. She hit him on the back with a rolling pin, and he packed his things and left. Now she’s howling through the whole stairwell that her son abandoned her.”
Irina could not hold back a smile.
“Thank you for letting me know. But those are no longer my problems.”
An hour later, Semyon called.
“Ira, we need to talk.”
“About what?”
“I… I realized I was wrong. Let’s meet.”
“Why?”
“Maybe we can try to fix everything? I’ll talk to Mom, explain…”
“Semyon, what happened? Did Mommy ask you to wash the floors?”
“She’s completely lost her mind! She demands that I come to her every day! Cook, clean, go to the store! She says that since there’s no wife, I have to do it myself!”
“That’s logical. You said yourself — those are family duties.”
“But I work!”
“So did I. That didn’t stop you from demanding that I lick your mother’s apartment clean every week.”
“Ira, forgive me! Only now did I understand what it was like for you!”
“It’s too late, Semyon. I’ve already filed for divorce.”
“But where will I go? Mom said she won’t let me back in until I bring you to her with an apology!”
“YOU CAN GO TO HELL!” Irina shouted into the phone. “And your dear mommy can roll right after you! You mocked me for ten years, and now you can eat what you cooked yourselves! Where are your aunts? Let them help! Where is Marina? Let her run over! I am no longer your servant! GET LOST!”
“Ira, please…”
“Listen here, mommy’s boy! Here’s my last piece of advice: if you want Mommy to take you back, buy a bucket, a mop, and march over there to scrub her apartment! Every week! No — every day! Wash her toilet yourself, carry her bags yourself, cook for her yourself! Those are ‘family duties,’ just like you said!”
“But that’s humiliating!”
“And humiliating me wasn’t humiliating? GET OUT! And I don’t want to hear your voice again!”
Irina hung up. Five minutes later, someone began pounding on the door. Semyon was standing on the landing with a suitcase.
“Irina, open up! Let’s talk like civilized people!”
Irina approached the door.
“Semyon, GET LOST! You have five minutes. Then I’m calling the police!”
“This is my apartment too!”
“It was. Now it will be only mine. I’ve already told the lawyer all about your little tricks. And the neighbors are ready to confirm how you screamed at me. So roll back to your mommy!”
“Where am I supposed to go?”
“To the water spirit, for all I care! You can stay with your aunts. Or with Marina. They’re ‘family,’ as you all loved to repeat!”
“They won’t let me in!”
“THAT IS NO LONGER MY PROBLEM!”
Irina returned to the living room and turned up the music so she would not hear Semyon pounding on the door. Half an hour later, everything went quiet.
That evening, her friend Olga called.
“Irka, you won’t believe what I just saw! Your ex was standing with a suitcase outside his mother’s door, and she wouldn’t let him in! She was screaming across the whole courtyard that he was an ungrateful son, and that if he couldn’t force his wife to work, then he should work himself!”
“And what happened next?”
“Then came the circus! His aunts came running and started shaming him. They said, ‘Your mother is suffering because of you, your wife left because of you!’ And he told them, ‘Then you help her!’ And they said, ‘We have our own families!’ So your Semyon was left to spend the night on the staircase. The concierge says he later went to some friend’s place.”
Irina smiled.
“Let him go. Maybe his friend will teach him how to wash floors. Because Mommy has become demanding now — she needs a servant. A free one.”
“You did the right thing by leaving!”
“I didn’t leave. I kicked him out. This is my home. I pay for it, I live in it. And all parasites — OUT!”
A month later, Irina learned the continuation of the story from mutual acquaintances. Valentina Petrovna, left without her free helper, tried to exploit her sisters. They quickly told her where to go. Then she switched to Marina, but Marina threatened to cut ties completely. In the end, Semyon was forced to rent a room and go to his mother every weekend — to clean, cook, and do laundry. Valentina Petrovna ordered him around the way she had once ordered Irina around, only more harshly — she was offended.
“You have only yourself to blame, you didn’t keep your wife!” she shouted through the whole stairwell. “Now deal with it yourself!”
And Irina expanded her flower business and opened a second shop. And every Saturday, when she used to break her back at her mother-in-law’s place, she now went to a spa salon.
She had earned it
